We are THOSE people!

Last night, I couldn't sleep. This happens too much, and here's the most ridiculous part. During the day, when you're awake, all your life decisions make sense. It's easy to convince yourself you are doing the right thing, spending your time on the right things, spending all your energy on the right things. Then, suddenly because you can't sleep, everything begins to not make sense. You realize while trying to fall asleep that you shouldn't spend your time doing what you're doing, spend your money on what you're spending it on, spend your energy on such silly things. Why is it that in the middle of the night all of the things you are confident about no longer make any sense at all? And really, if you had to justify why you are doing what you're doing with your life, you are convinced that you couldn't convince anyone that you've made the best decisions. It's exhausting, really.

So that was me last night. During the onslaught of uncertainty, I determined that Will and I might be those people who are well, annoying. Here's why. We have been talking a lot about our backyard adventures--chickens, gardens, a pond with fishies, composting, rabbits that we are either going to breed and sell or just breed and eat, recycling, etc. etc. People who talk about this stuff have really annoyed me in the past. It's the whole living green concept. It can be annoying to hear about. Here's an example. A few years ago, I was sitting on someone's back porch at a cook out. We were discussing the use of bug spray and how at my wedding, I was considering stashing bottles of Off! on every row of chairs so people wouldn't be eaten alive by mosquitoes. This girl responded, "Oh, I don't use Off! Instead, I like to use an environmentally-friendly bug repellent. It uses a mixture of lemon oil, eucalyptus, blah blah blah." I remember the car ride home and making such a scene about how annoying people are when they force green living attempts on people. In reality, this girl was just talking, not forcing. But, I was annoyed. I think I've maybe become that girl. Oh lord. In conversations lately, what I have to talk about pretty much ranges from my dogs to all these backyard adventures which are somewhat greenish. In my head, I'm just talking about it because I really think it's cool. But people might really think this is annoying, like I'm forcing green-ness on them. Hence, the title. We have (maybe quite seriously) become those people who used to really, really annoy me. So this hit me in the middle of the night, and I was in a bit of a panic.

Now that it's day time again, I feel better. I just ate our first two eggs to get my reality check. Here's the other thing...really I'm not sure that what we're doing makes us "green." I think I still do plenty of non-green things. Like...driving my car for instance and using tons of electricity to keep my house cold in July. I've also decided I just need to poll my audience a little rather than expecting people to think chickens and rabbits are cool. In other words, I should just be quiet about what's going on in my backyard and recycling bin unless I'm at least 90% positive that the people I'm talking to would care. Good plan I think, until I try to fall asleep tonight and convince myself otherwise.