This morning on Sunday Morning, which is my favorite show of the weekend, the host Charles Osgood was announcing the upcoming stories before a commercial break. He mentioned Martin Luther King, Jr. and a story about shoe making, then with a complete shift of voice from scholarly to condescending he said, "And Bill Geist scours Chatanooga, TN." Geist is the man of the show who goes out on a limb. Today he's touring a tow truck museum. In the past, he's shown interesting hotels, actually taping himself spending the night in an igloo hotel. He slept on a huge block of ice. How could Charles Osgood speak condescendingly of a guy like that, a guy who challenges the tight journalistic world? The audacity!
mmmmhmmm.
Last night, I went to the noble barn and didn't buy books, but just bought 3 magazines. Felt a short twinge of guilt. Magazines are just so noncommital that they're perfect reading for a busy person. I kind of wish I had gotten a journalism degree. That way I could try to be a magazine editor or something similar. It's something about the slick pages. I want to be the person who arranges people or objects or whatever in the pictures they take to put in the magazines. You know when there's an article on the 10 best watches for your money or the 10 best kitchen gadgets...well there's a person whose job is just to arrange the stuff against a colorful background or on a neat looking table. The props coordinator?? I want to be that person. I want to get to wear jeans or corduroys to work everyday. I never want to wear grown up shoes. I want to not wash my hair in the morning if I don't feel like it. Is that specific to a props coordinator, or do I just have qualms about my current life situation??? hmmm....and so it is.
Today I'm going to try to drive past the 5k mark and go on up to 4 miles. Think it will happen or will we just settle with an easy 2?? The decisions that have to be made on a Sunday...good stuff.
Sunday, January 16, 2005
Friday, January 14, 2005
Cinnamon
Toast in a variety of flavors: peanut butter, jam of all flavors, cinnamon and sugar, cheese, cream cheese, egg? Mmmmm! Give me a slice or 6 and one of those sizzling plates of fajitas. That's the current Kris Crave-o-meter.
This morning I was behind a dump truck, and on the radio, Soul Asylum's "Runaway Train" starts playing. WHAT!? I think to myself, how lucky am I? Remember that song? I bought the single cassette tape at Walmart when I was in 7th grade I think. Remember the single section in Walmart's electronic section? It was complete splendor, cassettes with 2 or 3 songs on it for like $2.
I read 45 pages aloud today at school. Would anyone like a short monologue from Among the Hidden or Chinese Cinderella. I can provide one. Also, who surrendered at Appomattox?
Today driving home from running on Frink Street, I thought I saw a small child off the right of the road in the ditch/woods wearing a white coat and an orange toboggan. I looked; it was just a fire hydrant. I thought it even had little arms.
Then, I ran over the garbage can top. Rubbermaid doesn't break.
This morning I was behind a dump truck, and on the radio, Soul Asylum's "Runaway Train" starts playing. WHAT!? I think to myself, how lucky am I? Remember that song? I bought the single cassette tape at Walmart when I was in 7th grade I think. Remember the single section in Walmart's electronic section? It was complete splendor, cassettes with 2 or 3 songs on it for like $2.
I read 45 pages aloud today at school. Would anyone like a short monologue from Among the Hidden or Chinese Cinderella. I can provide one. Also, who surrendered at Appomattox?
Today driving home from running on Frink Street, I thought I saw a small child off the right of the road in the ditch/woods wearing a white coat and an orange toboggan. I looked; it was just a fire hydrant. I thought it even had little arms.
Then, I ran over the garbage can top. Rubbermaid doesn't break.
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Elbow Patches
Has anyone else ever noticed that there's a cigarette lighter in the car? Does anyone ever use the cigarette lighter to light a cigarette. Most people who smoke in the car use regular lighters right? I've never seen this. Today I was plugging something else into my cigarette lighter and I noticed how silly the lighter looks in the car. It's like a little power source in the car. How nifty!? Who decided to put the cigarette lighter in the car, really? Does anyone know?
I just ran a 5k. I'm happy. I didn't die; almost tripped once, but didn't die.
I just ran a 5k. I'm happy. I didn't die; almost tripped once, but didn't die.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Slippery Intuition
On the way to work today I heard a commercial that might have just been heard in my alternaworld. It was a Sonic commercial with those 2 guys who get all the different slushie flavors and such. Well this morning, these 2 guys were talking about breakfast burritos, and one of them said, "They say that a burrito is the best way to start the day" or something like that. And then the other guy says, "Oh I don't listen to they, I only listen to them. Them says you should eat at Sonic." And there's some other verbal judo about the they versus them. OK now the reason this was such a fantastic happening is because ONE, I laughed out loud and had to put the coffee down for fear of spilling and TWO, yesterday I was attacked by the "Hypothetical THEY," an evil cousin to the "Royal WE." (Aside: In high school, our librarian used to often say things like, "We don't put our feet on the couch." or "We don't talk as loudly as you're talking in the library." That librarian probably also uses the hypothetical they.)
Back to my story, here's why the THEY ever even happened yesterday. OK see I went at it on my computer at school messing with our grading program b/c a bunch of my kids have moved away so I just started deleting them, but then needed to re-export grades and blah blah blah. None the less, the fact that I used my brain and my finger and mouse to click around on this dumb grading program was shocking!! and also caused a problem. (Aside: My uncle is a teacher again after a lot of years not teaching. The stock market dropped or crashed a couple years back, so he's back in the classroom. Every time I see him, he says, "So do you do grades on the computer? I say, "Yes." He says, "We do too." That's the conversation; we've had this talk word for word 4 times already.)
Back to my story, in a bit of an Ooops! I screwed up moment, I sought the help of a fearless leader just for advice on the situation I got myself into, and she said, "THEEEEEY say never to change anything on IGPRO. They say not to change anyone's status. They say they'll do it for us." WHO???? Who will do this and when and geeeez I thought I'd lose it. My fearless leader wanted me to become uptight, much like she is, but oh no; I'm far too laid back, even for a red head. SO! This morning when the Sonic guys start talking about listen to THEM not THEY, I just knew it was going to be a most excellent day, and it was.
What's the difference in swiss and suisse??? That's what I want to know.
Back to my story, here's why the THEY ever even happened yesterday. OK see I went at it on my computer at school messing with our grading program b/c a bunch of my kids have moved away so I just started deleting them, but then needed to re-export grades and blah blah blah. None the less, the fact that I used my brain and my finger and mouse to click around on this dumb grading program was shocking!! and also caused a problem. (Aside: My uncle is a teacher again after a lot of years not teaching. The stock market dropped or crashed a couple years back, so he's back in the classroom. Every time I see him, he says, "So do you do grades on the computer? I say, "Yes." He says, "We do too." That's the conversation; we've had this talk word for word 4 times already.)
Back to my story, in a bit of an Ooops! I screwed up moment, I sought the help of a fearless leader just for advice on the situation I got myself into, and she said, "THEEEEEY say never to change anything on IGPRO. They say not to change anyone's status. They say they'll do it for us." WHO???? Who will do this and when and geeeez I thought I'd lose it. My fearless leader wanted me to become uptight, much like she is, but oh no; I'm far too laid back, even for a red head. SO! This morning when the Sonic guys start talking about listen to THEM not THEY, I just knew it was going to be a most excellent day, and it was.
What's the difference in swiss and suisse??? That's what I want to know.
Monday, January 10, 2005
all dressed up no place to go
Today I was behind a dump truck that actually had a load. 40 logs or trees without the greenery. I counted as I sat at the 4 way stop. Oh the joy.
I'd planned on getting to work super early today, but that never works out. I woke up finally after hitting snooze about 15 times, and thinking that I could sleep all day b/c I had no obligations. At 6:13 reality struck and I leapt from beneath the covers and rushed around. I planned well last night preparing the necessary means of survival for the day: protein smoothie, turkey sandwich, yogurt, coffee pot ready to be turned on, gym clothes in bag, huge binder with curriculum crap in bag. I walked into the living room shocked that Katie Couric, who I love as long as she's just doing the news (her jokes are terrible sometimes), was already on the TV. That's my cue to hurry up hurry up. So I run around unable to find my keys while all the other things I'd so carefully prepared laughed at me, but still managed to start my car so some of the heavy Cayce condensation can drip off enabling me to see. My coffee cup, this Walmart to go cheap-o version, starts leaking water. I filled it with coffee, it leaked water. Go figure. So that was a mess. Then with all those bags thrown over one shoulder I bang out the door and get in the car. I drive all the way down Pine street and think, Brrr, I want my coffee, reaching down to the cup holder to find it empty. So, I throw the car into reverse and back all the way back down Pine street. (Secretly, having a great time, but a little stressed b/c I was planning on being early to work!) I leave the car running in the middle of the road (fortunately I'd taken the car key off the ring) so I sprint inside (in my grown up shoes) and find my coffee cup sitting in the dark living room. Whew! I made it to school to find that the track coach put a White Knoll Track T-shirt in my box. He THINKS I'm coaching. HA! They aren't going to pay me extra though. Are you kidding??? That's his method of cohersion I guess.
Oh well...I've survived grumpy kids today, running into the little pull out thing on my desk, reading aloud, and the Xerox machine. It's a good day.
I'd planned on getting to work super early today, but that never works out. I woke up finally after hitting snooze about 15 times, and thinking that I could sleep all day b/c I had no obligations. At 6:13 reality struck and I leapt from beneath the covers and rushed around. I planned well last night preparing the necessary means of survival for the day: protein smoothie, turkey sandwich, yogurt, coffee pot ready to be turned on, gym clothes in bag, huge binder with curriculum crap in bag. I walked into the living room shocked that Katie Couric, who I love as long as she's just doing the news (her jokes are terrible sometimes), was already on the TV. That's my cue to hurry up hurry up. So I run around unable to find my keys while all the other things I'd so carefully prepared laughed at me, but still managed to start my car so some of the heavy Cayce condensation can drip off enabling me to see. My coffee cup, this Walmart to go cheap-o version, starts leaking water. I filled it with coffee, it leaked water. Go figure. So that was a mess. Then with all those bags thrown over one shoulder I bang out the door and get in the car. I drive all the way down Pine street and think, Brrr, I want my coffee, reaching down to the cup holder to find it empty. So, I throw the car into reverse and back all the way back down Pine street. (Secretly, having a great time, but a little stressed b/c I was planning on being early to work!) I leave the car running in the middle of the road (fortunately I'd taken the car key off the ring) so I sprint inside (in my grown up shoes) and find my coffee cup sitting in the dark living room. Whew! I made it to school to find that the track coach put a White Knoll Track T-shirt in my box. He THINKS I'm coaching. HA! They aren't going to pay me extra though. Are you kidding??? That's his method of cohersion I guess.
Oh well...I've survived grumpy kids today, running into the little pull out thing on my desk, reading aloud, and the Xerox machine. It's a good day.
Thursday, January 6, 2005
Feel the Sensation
I'm at school and wanted to get on here and whine about dump trucks. BUT, as I was coming to the dashboard page, the computer just went right to my blog. HOW DID IT KNOW WHO I WAS???? That's what I want to know. I never logged in. This is creepy.
So about dump trucks. In Cayce, on my drive to work each morning, I get behind a dump truck. We have this pesky yield sign/stop sign situation to pull through before we can really get on the big road and these dump trucks are so freakin slow. I timed it today. It took this dump truck 5 minutes to get through these two signs. And when I say dump truck, perhaps you are picturing an 18-wheeler. OH NO! They really are dump trucks. Picture a Tonka truck that is old and rusty. I swear I never saw these until I moved to Cayce, and they're out in high numbers. Where are they going I wonder. But you know how they sound, grinding their gears just trying to lurch forward. I know it's tough to drive such a ridiculous sized truck (big enough to need a ladder to get in the driver's seat), but it just amazes me at how poorly they're designed or something. I want them to go faster. I can't handle the sound they make choking on themselves through the yield sign which for them is a big stop sign. Ugh. It makes me cringe like crying children and alarms do.
I just ate goldfish and a york peppermint pattie. They spell patty with "ie" is that right??
So about dump trucks. In Cayce, on my drive to work each morning, I get behind a dump truck. We have this pesky yield sign/stop sign situation to pull through before we can really get on the big road and these dump trucks are so freakin slow. I timed it today. It took this dump truck 5 minutes to get through these two signs. And when I say dump truck, perhaps you are picturing an 18-wheeler. OH NO! They really are dump trucks. Picture a Tonka truck that is old and rusty. I swear I never saw these until I moved to Cayce, and they're out in high numbers. Where are they going I wonder. But you know how they sound, grinding their gears just trying to lurch forward. I know it's tough to drive such a ridiculous sized truck (big enough to need a ladder to get in the driver's seat), but it just amazes me at how poorly they're designed or something. I want them to go faster. I can't handle the sound they make choking on themselves through the yield sign which for them is a big stop sign. Ugh. It makes me cringe like crying children and alarms do.
I just ate goldfish and a york peppermint pattie. They spell patty with "ie" is that right??
Monday, January 3, 2005
Ontario, California
Who knew?
I start work again tomorrow. So, I went shopping today to celebrate. The limited had a sale; that was fun. I stood in line for 30 minutes. In front of me, a lady had her son. He was in a stroller and he kept pulling dollar bills out of his pocket. They were all crumpled up, and he would start crying when he looked at them. He'd hand them to his mom, and she would unfold them and give them back to him. He couldn't figure out how to change the state of a folded dollar bill! It was great. While his mom went to work on his dollars, meanwhile holding a stack of super cheap clothes under her arm, he would kick his little Timberland-ed feet up and hug himself. There was serious suspense. Would his dollars be OK?
I also hit the OH-SO semi annual sale at victoria's secret. There's just nothing like digging up to your elbows through bins of underpants with strangers. I stood in line there for another 3o minutes. This time a grown-up version of entertainment. This guy was talking to the whole crowd of women in a loud voice about how this girl beat him up.
"I was all sitting downtown at Sharkey's having a drink, and bam! this girl knocked me across the head."
"Wow!" I thought, "That must've sucked."
"Yea," he continued unfortunately, "She said she was pregnant with my kid. Nah, it wasn't mine, she was with this other guy, we stopped having sex 12 weeks ago!" He continued to exclaim similar statements, eventually rounding it all up with, "It was that other guy's kid."
Oh brother.
This comes AFTER a mom and daughter pair were behind me talking about how the daughter's husband said, "Go to Vickies (sp????) and just blow some money." So the mom kept bringing over weird lingerie that this daughter would not look good in. The classic line throughout the whole conversation about how to use garter belts was this: Mom says, "You know I can rinestone anything you want later." Does she have a machine to do this with???
People are just a riot.
I start work again tomorrow. So, I went shopping today to celebrate. The limited had a sale; that was fun. I stood in line for 30 minutes. In front of me, a lady had her son. He was in a stroller and he kept pulling dollar bills out of his pocket. They were all crumpled up, and he would start crying when he looked at them. He'd hand them to his mom, and she would unfold them and give them back to him. He couldn't figure out how to change the state of a folded dollar bill! It was great. While his mom went to work on his dollars, meanwhile holding a stack of super cheap clothes under her arm, he would kick his little Timberland-ed feet up and hug himself. There was serious suspense. Would his dollars be OK?
I also hit the OH-SO semi annual sale at victoria's secret. There's just nothing like digging up to your elbows through bins of underpants with strangers. I stood in line there for another 3o minutes. This time a grown-up version of entertainment. This guy was talking to the whole crowd of women in a loud voice about how this girl beat him up.
"I was all sitting downtown at Sharkey's having a drink, and bam! this girl knocked me across the head."
"Wow!" I thought, "That must've sucked."
"Yea," he continued unfortunately, "She said she was pregnant with my kid. Nah, it wasn't mine, she was with this other guy, we stopped having sex 12 weeks ago!" He continued to exclaim similar statements, eventually rounding it all up with, "It was that other guy's kid."
Oh brother.
This comes AFTER a mom and daughter pair were behind me talking about how the daughter's husband said, "Go to Vickies (sp????) and just blow some money." So the mom kept bringing over weird lingerie that this daughter would not look good in. The classic line throughout the whole conversation about how to use garter belts was this: Mom says, "You know I can rinestone anything you want later." Does she have a machine to do this with???
People are just a riot.
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